This is Life

So the last few days....yeah, they've been less than ideal.  We'd been looking forward to a long weekend with Kris at home.  Big plans.  Big as in running errands as a family, going to the pool, eating out, etc.  We're crazy like that.

But all it takes is one mean stomach bug to kill the crazy.

I'll try to spare all the details, but it began Saturday morning.  I woke up feeling yuk.  I figured it was just the migraine I was recovering from.  I got over it by the afternoon, though.  I hadn't eaten anything all day, and all that sounded good to me was a Whataburger milkshake.  That can cure close to anything.  Sadie went for the ride and got one also.  She couldn't drink too much by the time we got home because it was too frozen.  We walk in the back door, she put her milkshake down, said no thank you, and threw up.  Nice.  She seemed totally fine leading up to that and immediately following.  hhhmmm....I thought that maybe she had just choked, gagged, something to make her throw up.  Wrong.

We'd been having yard work done all day, and one of the guys came to the front door to ask me something.  I was holding Harrison at the time who was screaming about something.  I had stepped outside and closed the door to keep the dog from escaping.  Then Sadie opened the door, shirt off, mumbled something, and puked out the door....landing at the guy's feet.  Possibly even getting on his shoes.  Sorry, dude.  He was like - oh, she's sick, we'll take care of it (it being the question he was asking, not the puke, unfortunately).  Then she threw up again.  I wanted to do the same.  Harrison was still crying, she started crying, and I had a big mess on my hands.

The next few days get all jumbled in my memory because, well, vomit will do that to you.  Then it was the fever.  And "the other".  And our crazy fun weekend plans went down the drain.

To sum things up....

If she isn't asleep, this is the expression she's kept on her face since Saturday.

I know these bugs just have to run their course, but by yesterday afternoon I thought that it should be better by now.  I called to talk to a nurse.  She said that it has been going on too long and I should bring her in.  I kept hoping she'd wake up this morning all better so I could cancel the appointment.  No such luck.  I took her to the doc, and what did she say?  It just has to run its course.  Really?  Thanks, nurse, for telling me to come in.  Wonder how much that one line of advice cost me?  

She fell asleep on the way home, took a long nap, still refuses to drink Pedialyte or Gatorade, hasn't eaten more than a few crackers in a few days.....so what do I do?  I continue to sit and hold her, let her be a baby and milk this sickness.  I mean, she's going to be three next week.  I can't sit and hold her forever, might as well take advantage while I can.  Even if she is sick.  So while I sit and hold her, I let Harrison do this:

Who says tv is bad for kids?  Well, maybe it is.  But it sure is good for mommy!

So, life goes on.  And so does the constant disinfecting of our home.  

The People

Sadie has never been a good sleeper.  We all know that.  But a few months ago, it was getting really bad.  Sadie, what's wrong?  Why do you not like your room?  The people.  The people in my room.  What people?  The boy.  The boy wake me up.

So I just figured she'd had a bad dream.

It continued....Kris or I have to get in bed with her until she falls asleep, sneak out, only to wake up to her screams a few hours later.  The people scare me!  The people wake me up!

Recurring dream?

It has gotten so bad that she doesn't even want to nap in her room.  She has been napping on my bed or the guest bed in Harrison's room.  I've been like - whatever, I'm not fighting this battle.  As long as she's napping, she can nap wherever she wants.  But at night, she's staying in HER bed!

We have asked more about "the people".  It never changes, she says that it's a boy.  A big boy or a little boy?  She says it's a boy like Evan (my four year old nephew).  What does the boy do?  He scare me.  He spray water on me and scare me.

A few weeks ago my mom came to visit.  She stayed in Harrison's room in the guest bed, Sadie in her own bed.  As usual, we had to go to Sadie's rescue in the night.  The next morning, my mom asked why we sat up talking in the living room after getting Sadie.  We didn't, we took her straight to our bed with us.  She said she could have sworn she heard talking.  hhhmmmm.....

Then this past weekend we went to my parents' house.  Sadie slept with my parents.  Mom told me that Sadie didn't move a muscle and slept all night.  Without any questioning, Sadie told me - I slept so good, no people come to TyTy's house.  The people stay outside and don't come scare me.  Again, hhmmmm......

The past two nights, we let Sadie sleep in the guest bed and put Harrison in her room.  She has slept all night!  Well, she made it to 4:30 the first night and 6:30 this morning.  I consider that a good night.  So this morning she told me - no people come in Harrison's room and scare me, I had good night.

This is beginning to creep me out a bit.  Or a lot.  I wonder if 1-800-GHOSTBUSTERS is a working number.

Be Still My Heart

Things that make my heart skip a beat:

My man and my girl

My men

Going outside and finding Sadie singing If You're Happy and You Know It with Harrison while doing the hand motions for him.

And yes, yellow bunny Peeps.  Not any of those weird purple or blue colors out there, and only the bunnies will do.  Please, no chicks.  Yellow Peeps, people!

At It Again

If you've kept up with my blog for a while, like a long while, you might recall my adventures in Jazzercise.    I really did enjoy the class.  Until my pregnancy with Harrison.  No way could I continue to go.  I would be running to the bathroom every eight counts to...you know.  Do what women do who have extreme morning sickness.  Anyway, that was the end of my Jazzercise career.  For a while anyway.

Harrison is here, he's seven months old now (eek!  How did that happen?), and I still have lots of Harrison fat all over my body.  So, it was time to join up again.  I've decided that it's best for me to join a class, or else I'd get on a treadmill or some other sort of machine, and once I broke a sweat decide that I'm done.  In a class, I'm stuck for a full hour.  An hour of jumping and twisting and "dancing" and sweating.  

Yesterday I went to a class with an instructor I'd never "danced" with before.  Remember Ronnie from Can't Buy Me Love.  Who could forget him?  Remember this? (I just went back and watched this clip, and it's long.  Longer than necessary.  I'm not smart enough to figure out how to only post the section necessary to get my point across.  Nor am I patient enough to research how to do it.  So just the first couple of minutes are all you need to watch.  If you choose to watch at all.  Heck, you might have stopped reading after the first paragraph, so I'm just wasting my breath right now.)

Yeah, that's how I felt.  Except the crowd didn't watch me and want to copy my every move.  I'm just not that cool.

A Picture is Worth....A Lot!!

There are many reasons why I do not like living far from my parents.  I miss them.  I would love for Sadie and Harrison to grow up close to them.  I want the kids to be able to play with their cousins regularly.  And I don't like living far from my parents for selfish reasons also.  I can't just call and say - hey, I'm bringing the kids over so I can clean, cook, run errands, workout, etc.

My house is in a constant state of...mess.  I can't go to the gym since I need childcare, so that's one of my excuses for being fat.  (actually, I could, but I'm not ready to drop off Harrison at some random room with dirty toys and a teenager.)  I go to the grocery store and end up with three bags of goldfish crackers, string cheese, some fruit and milk, but nothing to make a meal with.  It's 10:30 by the time I'm ready to leave the house, so that doesn't leave much time to do anything before needing to be home for Sadie's nap.

All of this to say, I need a little help.  Kris thinks I need a lot of help.  And all of this makes me feel like such a failure.  I'm facing the facts, though, something's gotta give.  So, the search is on.  I think my expectations are a bit unrealistic.  I want someone who I can call on a couple days a week in the morning, but not necessarily the same day every week.  I have things come up, I might have a play date for the kids, and I don't want to turn these things down because I have a scheduled sitter at my home.

Anyway, I've been searching on two different websites.  Let me tell you who I am going to immediately pass over and not even give a second chance.  Please don't post a glamour shot.  If I can't decide if they're wearing shorts or panties, I will not contact them.  Surely they can find someone to take a snapshot - I will not look at a profile if they are dressed for a night out on the town and decide that's a good time to snap a picture of themselves sitting in their car.  If the picture has a gold/orange tint to it and makes me think that it was taken in 1987, I will pass right over.  Some look like they would steal from me.  Nope.  OK, so I don't want a glamour shot, I don't want you dressed for a night on the town, but at least a little makeup would be nice.  Not even makeup.  Just dress as though you care.  A little.

Then I find pictures that are acceptable.  When reading the profile, if it's obvious they are not proficient in English, I will have to keep searching.  I need them to be able to communicate with my children.  If grammar and punctuation are a mess, most likely you will not be hired by me.

I want a younger girl who is educated and loves children.  Sounds easy enough.  But it's not.  If I want them young and educated, they're probably in school and can't help in the mornings.  Or if they are young and educated, I would hope they'd be able to get a "real" job.

Blah blah blah....this is tough.  Are there any young educated girls who know how to take a decent picture out there who would enjoy playing with my kids for a few hours each week?  We shall see.  Wish me luck as the search continues!

Date Night: Then and Now

I realize that this is very natural and not unusual, but last night it hit me.  Kris and I are like a real married couple with young kids.  When did this happen?  It's weird.  But great.  And often stressful.  But fun.

While dating, Kris and I were very casual.  Seriously dating, but our dates were casual.  Nothing really over the top or necessarily romantic.  We would hang out at home, and.....as I sit here trying to reflect on our past dating life, I cannot really remember dates.  Whatever.  Anyway....

Our church has a Kid/Parents' Night Out once a month.  Last night was that night.  Children get to play with their friends at church from 6-10:00.  So, it's 5:30 and I'm sitting at the table with wet hair feeding Harrison.  No makeup.  Sadie is running around doing who knows what.  I had just taken a shower but should have waited until after I got sprayed with sweet potatoes and cereal.  Around 5:50, Kris asks what time the kids can be dropped off.  Well, not yet since I'm not ready.  I hurriedly put on makeup, grab the first thing I could find to wear, chase Sadie in order to dress her, get Harrison's bag packed, and we're out the door.  Whew!

We leave the kids at 6:20, but we have no idea what we're going to do.  We'd thought about going to see a movie, but my thoughts were 1. it's expensive to go to the movies, and 2. if I'm sitting still in a dark room, chances are I will fall asleep.  And isn't the point of having a night out with your spouse to converse and catch up on all that you don't get to talk about while kids are around?  So we drive.  Sadie needs some clothes, her wardrobe is worn and quite limited.  OK.  So we go shopping.  For the kids.  Then we went to dinner.  And discussed kids.  What did we talk about before they came along?  The weather, I guess.

The kids were picked up.  Harrison was asleep and Sadie was sleepy.  They both got in bed without any problems.  Time to get ourselves ready for bed.  In the bathroom, Kris is brushing his teeth while I take off my makeup.  I put on my mismatched pajamas, go to bed, and Kris is already there.  Snoring.  And that was our night.

Yep, it's happened.  We are that couple.

(This is completely off topic, but I just thought I'd throw it out there.  While pregnant with Sadie, people were always so nice to help out with advice on things I would and would not need.  One item I heard over and over that was pointless was a diaper wipe warmer.  OK, won't get one of those.  So yesterday I was sitting on the floor changing Harrison's diaper when Sadie came up behind me and put a wipe on the back of my neck.  I jumped!  That thing was COLD!  Seriously.  I yelled, which she thought was hilarious.  She kept putting it on my bare skin.  I didn't like it.  If I didn't like a baby wipe on my neck, I'm sure it can't be comfortable to have your bottom wiped with one.  Poor Harrison.  I'm thinking now that I might need one after all.  Because my children are spoiled.)

Baby Jesus, Where Are You?!

Up until this year, I've always been one of those "no Christmas until after Thanksgiving" sort of people.  But I've been looking forward to enjoying Christmas with a little one who is old enough to somewhat understand things and get excited.  So I told Kris earlier this week that I wanted to get the tree up this weekend.  In fact, I never even decorated for Thanksgiving, which I usually go all out for.  (Having a needy baby played a part in this decision.)

Sadie and I were looking at a Fisher Price catalog and talking about the nativity set that was advertised. I bought her one last year and said that we should go find it.  So off to the attic we went.  I dug out boxes and boxes (big ones!) of Christmas decor.  The whole time, Sadie was saying - Baby Jesus, where are you?  Baby Jesus!  Over and over.  I'm thankful that I stopped myself from vocalizing what was in my mind.  I came so close to telling her that Baby Jesus was buried in here somewhere.  Oh my.  Under all the Santas and snowmen and ornaments, Baby Jesus couldn't be found.  My heart dropped.  Dear Jesus, I am so sorry.

I found a ceramic nativity set that she was excited to unwrap.  She found Baby Jesus and started playing with the set.  Then she dropped a piece on the floor and chipped it.  I told her we had to put it away so she didn't break it.  She immediately started crying and saying - more Jesus.  Again, conviction.

Back to the attic we went.  This time I wasn't stopping until I found her nativity set.  I dug and dug as she continued to sing - Baby Jesus, where are you?  More Jesus, more Jesus!!

That is my prayer this holiday season.  I want to have the heart of my two year old.  Let us continue to search until we find Jesus.  And may we not cover him up with Santa Claus and snowmen.  Yes, we will enjoy the lights and ornaments and presents under the tree, but I say....MORE JESUS!!